Soul Survival Kit: Happiness

20121114-070803.jpgWhenever I ask a new client what it is they really want, they usually say -without hesitation – they want to be happy.

Happiness seems to be a holy grail for many people, something which they aspire to have but aren’t really sure if it actually exists.

I tell my clients that happiness is as easy as A, B, C. Let’s take a brief look at what I mean.

A is for Awareness
If I ask those clients who have said happiness is what they want, what would make you happy?, this is when their answers are less certain. Some may say more money (or less money worries), some will say better health and some just don’t really know. What they are sure of is that something in their life isn’t working and causing them to be unhappy. Understanding what it is that makes you unhappy is as important as recognising what makes you feel the opposite. Raising your awareness to what it is you actually want (and don’t want) and how you can achieve your dreams has to be the first step to achieving your happiness goal. What is working in your life right now?

B is for Belief
Even if you believe you don’t have any beliefs you still believe that you don’t! We all have beliefs about something, whether its religion, politics, work, family life or just the way of the world. How many times have you heard a story about something “bad” which has happened and said “that’s the world we live in”. These are your beliefs which in turn influence your happiness. Take some time to think about what beliefs you have and how they govern the way your view your personal world. Are events conspiring against you? Does nothing ever go your way? Have a think about how you’ve drawn those conclusions and how these beliefs shape your ability to be happy. Consider whether or not people, material possessions can truly make you happy or whether happiness rests with your state of mind. Then ask yourself what you believe about yourself. Do you believe you are a good person? Do you believe you deserve to be happy? If you’ve answered no to the last two questions then how you feel about yourself is almost certainly standing in your way of being happy.

C is for commitment
In order to be truly happy you have to make a commitment to yourself to understand yourself better (Awareness) and review your thoughts (Beliefs) and how these may be standing in your way. This isn’t just a commitment to your personal development, it’s an undertaking on your part to put your happiness high up your priority list. If you really want to be happy, you must set the intention to be so.

Happiness is about recognising why you want to be happy and how you can achieve it. Be specific. Write down what would make you happy, how you would feel and what your life would actually look like? It starts with understanding what’s stopping you being happy and whether the way you think is standing in your way. Consider how much pressure you put on yourself and others through expectation and if it is your belief about what would make you happy which is in fact your biggest obstacle.

Is it unrealistic to achieve constant happiness?
Its not unrealistic and its not unachievable either. Even when you experience a life changing event which upsets or distresses you that doesn’t mean you are an unhappy individual. When you learn to love yourself and who you are, are able to recognise that your happiness doesn’t rest with the actions or presence of others, you surround yourself with like-minded Souls who bring out the best in you without expectation – and know what you it is you really want and makes you happy – you will always radiate an element of contented energy.

“Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions” – Dalai Lama

For more information about ways to be happy book a Soul Sparkle consultation

The information provided on this page is open to individual interpretation and may not be suitable for everyone. It is not intended to replace the advice of your healthcare team. Please speak to your doctor before deciding upon any form of action which may affect your health or if you have any concerns about your health and wellbeing.

© Delphi Ellis all rights reserved.

Published by Delphi Ellis

Therapeutic Counsellor, Well-being Trainer and Mindfulness Practitioner working with grief and mental health. Explores dreams on telly. Avid tea drinker. © Delphi Ellis - Helping You Sparkle™ 2006 - 21

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